web analytics
Call or Text (614) 301-8030 dawn@buildingfamilycounseling.com

Adoption Academy this Monday

At the airport on our way to an adoption conference in Portland in 2008.

On our way to an adoption conference in Portland in 2008. The moving sidewalk at the airport during a layover was her favorite part.

My daughter and I will be sitting on the Adoption Academy panel this Monday hosted by The National Center for Adoption Law & Policy and Nationwide Children’s Hospital. I will be there to encourage my daughter and hopefully she’ll be doing most of the talking when it’s our turn to share.

The Adoption Academy is a great (and inexpensive!) opportunity for prospective adoptive parents to get an overview of many different kinds of adoption to better understand what way of building their families might be right for them.

Because I was asked to speak as an adoptive parent (not as a professional specializing in adoption) I asked them if my daughter could come with my support instead. I did this because a few months ago when I was on my way out to another speaking engagement my daughter (who is 10 as of this writing) said, “Why don’t they ask me? After all, I am the adopted one!”

She had a good point.

We adoptive parents tend to seek each other out for information and support and sometimes that’s appropriate but if we don’t widen our cultural view we run into the danger of assuming that our vantage point is the only one or the most right one.

Fortunately there are more and more opportunities for us to hear from the other players in adoption. Publications like Gazillion Voices, events like the Ohio Birthparent Group‘s All Adoption peer support meeting (every second Tuesday in my office at 7pm), and the blogs of first parents and adoptees allow us to listen and learn, giving us the chance to be better, more inclusive, more understanding parents.

What we’ll hear isn’t always easy and we won’t always agree with what is said. But the experience will give us a better understanding of adoption in all of its complicated nuances, which will make us better parents to our own adopted kids.

I’ve been dragging my daughter to adoption conferences since she was in diapers and so she has been fortunate to hear from adult adoptees, birth parents and other adoptive parents and she has been chomping at the bit to add her own voice to the discussion. Over the weekend we’ll be practicing and playacting some of the questions she might get so she can think about how she wants to respond. Right now she knows that the message she is most anxious to impart is that there doesn’t need to be competition between adoptive parents and birth parents.

“It’s all family,” she explained, trying to decide how she wanted to articulate this.

There’s a strong possibility that my daughter will want to take a step back from participating in events like this as she edges closer to her teens and I will support her in that, too, but as long as she wants to share her story and her experiences, I want to help her do that.

So we’ll be seeing you Monday. It ought to be a good time.

 

Sharing around this week

fallpumpkin-insideHere are some things that caught my eye and that I shared on my Twitter or Google Plus or on my Building Family Counseling Facebook page this week:

  • Catie, my co-facilitator for the All Adoption group has decided to create a casual, peer support Central Ohio Adoptee only group! If you or anyone you know might be interested in meeting up monthly, please join the Facebook page to get more info. This is SO SO NEEDED and I’m really thrilled she’s doing it!
  • I loved these pictures from the Humans of New York book review over at Brain Pickings. I don’t think I’d be happy living someplace so crowded but I sure do like knowing that it’s there to visit.
  • My friend Janine’s father died last week and she shared this post of her memories of being a little girl and spending time with him. Janine is a terrific, terrific writer and ought to be in your feed readers.
  • Spilt Milk wrote about having her children nearly removed from her care when she was struggling with a crisis in her mental health. Mentally ill mothers can be good mothers, too.

Finally, please click the last link for a quick pick-me up!

 

Columbus networking group for counselors

I started my writing career in 1999 and in that time I learned that the writing community is generous, supportive and kind. Sure, I’ve met some bad apples but I’ve met way more good ones. Most of the writers I’ve been lucky to know are happy to share calls for submission and hard won editorial contacts.

So far I’ve had the same happy experience networking with other therapists. For example my waiting room chairs came from this kind counselor who decided to deliver the chairs himself so he could introduce himself and offer support. Pretty nifty, eh?

In this same spirit of encouragement and hospitality I’ve been working with a couple of colleagues to build a Columbus networking group for counselors through our local branch of the Ohio Counseling Association (MSWs and psychologists welcome, too). We will be having our first meeting at 7pm at the Karl Road Library on Tuesday, June 4th. If you’re a Columbus-area therapist and are interested in helping us create a dynamic, supportive networking group, please come on by. If you can’t make it this time but want to be added to our notification list, please contact me and I’ll add you.

Positive SSL